“Maybe humans are the real disease,” the protagonist tearfully exclaims as he clutches his zombified friend to his chest. Credits roll on the 9 inch airplane screen over scenes of cities overtaken by post-apocalyptic greenery, nature’s balance restored. A squirrel scampers into frame. The world is healing.
I munch my popcorn, unimpressed; as far as environmental messages go it’s uninspired- not to mention unrelated. Why zombies? Shambling blights that wander the earth in search of brains, driven by mindless consumption- well maybe when you put it that way. But, if I am an environmental zombie, maybe I need to consume information on sustainability. You are what you eat.
An anti-consumption cookbook for consumption
Sautéed Brain of Sustainability Conscious Human (Ethically sourced)
Ingredients
[1]https://calculator.carbonfootprint.com/calculator.aspx?tab=3
[2]https://www.veganfoodquest.com/vegan-guide-to-tokyo/
[3]https://www.happycow.net/asia/japan/
[4]https://www.toogoodtogo.com/ja
[5]https://sdgs.un.org/goals/goal12
[6]https://www.gotokyo.org/en/plan/getting-around/bicycles/index.html
[7]https://storymaps.arcgis.com/stories/775a6272b90b4656b6c590de520b6e39
[8]https://sdgs.un.org/topics/sustainable-transport
[9]https://en.japantravel.com/article/the-ultimate-guide-to-thrifting-in-tokyo/70762
[10]https://japaninternships.com/blogs/trashcans-in-japan/
[11]https://www.expatica.com/jp/house/household/recycling-in-japan-79875/
[12] https://catalog.he.u-tokyo.ac.jp/detail?code=FEN-SI4502L3&year=2026
Recipe
Step 1: Place the brain in a lightly oiled pan, and simmer on medium heat.
The release of cooking fumes reminds your zombie of its carbon emissions. The cost of its long-haul flight to Japan is 1.13 tonnes of CO2 emissions. [1]
Your zombie groans in dismay, the increase in global temperature from emissions will cook the earth like a brain in a pan. It vows to offset the emissions of its flight, and only fly direct and economy where necessary.
Sustainability +1
Step two: Flip the brain to sear both sides. Pluck the brain stem and eat, this allows your zombie to focus on cooking when hunger emerges.
Stems make your zombie crave greens; in Japan, sustainable food will make the best brain food. Your zombie uses its snack break to research sustainable foods for its visit. Vegan travel guides like VeganFoodQuest[2] and HappyCow[3] provide good sources of sustainable food in Tokyo- as animal farms comprise a large chunk of global emissions. Too good to go[4] provides an easy and sustainable way to avoid food waste, in alignment with SDGS goal 12.[5]
Your zombie wonders if brains are vegan.
Sustainability +1
Step 3: Lightly season the brain matter with flavour of choice.
Variety is the spice of life. Your zombies craves sustainable excitement. When in Japan it will use Tokyo’s free bicycle sharing services[6], along with the shinkansen, a sustainable rail alternative to short haul flights that reduces CO2 emissions by 97%,[7] to travel within the country, complying with SDGS goal 11[8]. It will thrift at second-hand stores[9] to lower consumption and fast fashion waste.
Sustainability +1
Step 4: Remove from pan and garnish. Place brain in vat environment to serve.
Environment of placement is key to adapting your zombie’s sustainability approach. There are few public bins in Tokyo[10], so a bag must be carried to dispose properly of rubbish at home and prevent littering. Your zombie must sort rubbish correctly according to Japan’s strict sustainable recycling systems.[11] Your zombie also craves brains, and will take advantage of offered modules on sustainability and environment to learn more at its host university.[12]
Sustainability + 1
Congratulations, your environmental zombie is now sustainable!
